So I’ve been wanting to write this post for a while now but school is in full-force and consuming me.
If you’re a regular reader you’ve read that I recently started dating/seeing someone new, who I have dubbed ‘Z’. I have not dated anyone since the summer before college and that was a serious relationship. The reason why… I have a problem.
Ever since my last relationship (which was full of issues that are a bit too personal to go into detail here) I have not been able to find peace with commitment. What’s wrong with me?! I know that being afraid of commitment is relatively normal, but I have a great guy in front of me and for some reason I feel like I need to back away?
This always happens. Z treats me well, is different than what I usually like (which is good since the guys I usually like have got me nowhere..clearly), makes me laugh and smile so much, and I can be myself around him which is something I’ve never experienced in past relationships even after dating for over a year. So why is it that I feel like I have to have a mile high wall put up? It’s not fair to make him try to climb over that wall… he doesn’t deserve that challenge just because I have an issue.
Any suggestions as to overcoming the fear of commitment would be greatly appreciated cause someday I’m going to have to deal with it like a big girl! 🙂
On a different note, this week has been full of studying, research paper writing, and coffee in copious amounts. This morning I was able to fit in some 400s and a delicious breakfast!
Delicious clif bar & a smoothie including: Pineapple chobani, strawberries, banana & chocolate protein scoop.
Time to get back to practicing a speech I have to give at one. Hopefully after my research project is done tomorrow I’ll be able to check in on all your blogs.
Tell me: Have you ever feared commitment? How did you get over it? Do you think I should take a step back until I’m ready or embrace it and run with it? Ay yi yi 😉